Heritage Announces a Sophomore Academy; Will Debut Next School Year

By: Joel Bryant

Heritage High School will open up an all-new Sophomore Academy next school year, according to sources close to the situation.

“The idea is to help ease the transition from the Freshman Academy to high school,” our source said.

Our sources have also indicated that this year’s group of freshmen haven’t behaved like true high schoolers and that one of the main focusses of the Sophomore Academy will be to counteract said bad behavior.  

“It’s crazy. It’s like they haven’t even left middle school. You know, we give them this separate space in the building, give them all the same teachers, make them take the same classes, and give them special advisories, and they’re acting like they’re in the eighth grade.”

The Sophomore Academy will occupy the 1600 hallway. Rumors have it that the sophomores may be allowed to go to other places in the school, such as the 600 hallway.

(April Fools)